Ugh

I'm having palpitations. Lots of 'em. Premature ventricular contractions are plaguing me from morning till night. While wearing a holter monitor a few days ago, over 11,000 contractions were recorded in 25 hours. Most of ya'lls will have 2, perhaps at most 10 in that same time period. I feel like crap! And no one can tell me why I'm having them. I must admit, there are times when I fear just a little for my life. I have kids... they just might miss me. Plus, it would be a tremendous shame for the world.

Lollipop girls

Has anyone else noticed lately, how much more acceptable it is becoming to have a head that's wider than your hips? I see so many lollipop girls these days, their airy inflated heads disproportionately standing out in a crowd of other stick-insects. Take gals like what's-her-face, that Olsen twin. Her head is decidedly bigger than her waist. That's just not natural, folks. And who are the guys that like this type of arm candy? What's gone so fundamentally wrong in their thought-process that they can't even see what's normal and what's decidedely freaky? What can we do to re-educate these poor, misguided fools? Force-feed them a diet of 16th century art, when women were women and stick insects were stick insects? The malnutritioned look needs to go, along with the airhead-like behavior of those same rib-sporting goons. We need to start educating our youngins now.

Hier ist die Nadle

I guess I've finally relented and joined the blogging community. Yet another useless waste-of-space rant-filled blog to fill up cyber-space. I've always wondered whether all these 1's and 0's get picked up on some other planet somewhere where they are scratching their purple-spotted heads trying to figure out what it is we're saying. Do they consider us interesting enough to one day contact us, or do they contemplate their navels, casting our messages aside like some soiled diapers? Do you really care? Do I? Well, I guess one might care if they read something on the internet that pissed them off and they're coming to challenge us to a duel.
Anyhoot, I digress.